Suggestion Box (Aug. 24 - 30)

The Legend of Neil: Episode 3 - A new episode has been released this week, and its a musical! Check it out here.

The Guild: Season 3 Premiere - Right now you can only get it on XBOX Live if you are a gold member, but it should be available to silver members, as well as on the internet, soon.

Capitalism: A Love Story trailer - The new Michael Moore documentary taking our economical system as its subject. Check it out here.

The Men Who Stare at Goats trailer - George Clooney is a "Jedi warrior." Got you interested, right? Check it out here.

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant trailer - I never thought I would see John C. Reilly as a vampire, but this role seems right up his alley. Check it out here.

Rental Review - The Last House on the Left (Unrated Edition)

The Last House on the Left is a gratuitous (both nudity and violence wise), brutal look at what people are willing to do to those who harm their family, and unfortunately, takes this revenge plot a bit too far.

During the summer, Mari Collingwood (Sara Paxton) and her family decide to vacation at their lake house. Shortly after, Mari and her friend Paige (Martha Maclsaac) are kidnapped by a psychotic family and eventually taken to the woods to die. After being raped (which was filmed rather inappropriately in my opinion), Mari attempts one last time to escape by swimming away. However, she doesn’t make it far before she is shot in the back and left to die in the water. Following this, the psychotic family are forced to stop at a house to get out of the rain, the same house that is owned by Mari’s family. Eventually it is agreed upon that the murderers should stay the night in the guesthouse, and finally, Mari’s parents come to realize whom exactly is staying in their house. Let the revenge begin.

The problem with this film is that it depicts man, on the whole, as being capable of doing things that cannot be forgiven. Clearly the murderers do this in their acts of sexual dominance and murder, however, the problem does not lie with them. Though their one-dimensional, psychotic tendencies are never explained, they at least have the excuse of being sociopaths on their side. The problem is with the depiction of Mari’s parents, John and Emma (Tony Goldwyn and Monica Potter). I can understand their rage at discovering what these people did to their child and their need to seek revenge; nevertheless, the depiction of their revenge becomes more horrifying than what they are seeking justice for. It reaches such an extreme point that by the end of the film John and Emma have become almost more monstrous than the characters the viewer is supposed to feel no apathy towards. I was taken aback by the depths to which they sink, and in the end I have to ask: do they take it too far? How far does protecting your own really go?

The Last House on the Left tries to glorify two parents seeking revenge on those who commit horrific crimes against their daughter; however, it is too uncomfortable and appalling for me to cheer for them and what they choose to do.

Final Grade: D

PS – Though nothing really good came from the film itself, one shining moment was the use of Taken By Trees’s cover of “Sweet Child o’ Mine” in the trailer. You should check it out.

Gaming Review - Batman: Arkham Asylum

Let me get this off my chest now: I am a major Superman fan. In the many debates I have had fighting over who is the better superhero, the Boy Scout or the brooding billionaire, I always choose the Boy Scout. However, I have to hand it to the bat, he has proven in Batman: Arkham Asylum to make a better hero for a videogame.

As the game begins, the player takes control of Batman as he escorts Joker back into Arkham Asylum after capturing him (without too much of a fight) in Gotham. Quickly, Batman’s skepticism is justified when Joker breaks free from the guards transporting him, escaping into the depths of the complex. With this, the Joker’s games begin.

The rest of the game is spent exploring the extensive buildings and grounds that make up the island, taking down the Joker’s henchmen and other villains in the process. The scale of the game world is ridiculous, and even though each building is made of a bunch of rooms and hallways, they never seem repetitive, especially when comparing one building to the next. As great as the design to these buildings are, my one complaint is that I felt the need to spend most of the time in detective mode, as not to miss anything important, making it more difficult to absorb everything around me and how it was meant to look. Instead, for most of the game I was immersed in a very limited color scheme, and I often had to remind myself to turn it off.

The character creation is another fantastic element of the game. Not only does Batman move fluidly, whether flaunting the movement of his cape or leaping over thugs, but he really looks great doing it. Furthermore, the supporting cast is created to such high detail as well, even if they are only seen briefly.

And what a group it is. Though I wish I could have seen their treatment of many of the other Batman villains, what they did with the characters they chose, from Poison Ivy to Harley Quinn, is more than you can hope for. However, the best moments by far are the run ins with the Scarecrow, both in how his poison gas manipulates the world around you, to the sections of side-scrolling, platforming action that accompany his attempts to break the bat. On a similar note, something that should be noted is how the boss battles are done in this game. Because a lot of the characters used draw their strength from brute force, it could have gotten very old quickly to spend battle after battle trying to beat down the other character. However, they chose to go about these things more originally, a prime example being their treatment of Killer Croc.

Though the main story line is strong on its own, I appreciated how the world of Arkham Asylum is slowly fleshed out with each item that you pick up along the way. First, there are the interview tapes of certain inmates, which explore the depths of their insanity, as well as some of the inner workings of why they are the way they are. Then there are the riddles the Riddler leaves for Batman to figure out as he explores the world. Though they don’t necessarily have evolving stories like the tapes or the Chronicles of Arkham, they do force the player to take in more of the smaller details that were put into creating the world, most of which would have been missed without this. And finally, there are the Chronicles, revealing the deterioration of the man behind the Asylum. Once you finish the main part of the game, it is definitely worth it to go back and find all of these that weren’t picked up along the way.

When it comes down to it, Batman: Arkham Asylum is definitely one of my favorites so far this year. Every aspect of the writing for the game is great, from the story to all the words spoken in the game, right down to the recordings being played as you run through the halls of the Medical Facility. Furthermore, they really did justice to the characters that fill Batman’s world, especially when considering the Joker (the main villain of the game). Overall, it is creepy, hilarious, and larger than life, everything you could hope for from a game about the Dark Knight.

Final Grade: 9.5

Now Playing Review - Post Grad

For all the romantic comedy highs and lows this summer has seen, Post Grad represents a lower point than I expected to reach.

Sadly, for the viewing public, it is rare to see a romantic comedy that defies what is expected of it. Instead, most romcoms fit the description of being riddled with this genre’s clichés. Post Grad is no exception to this unfortunate rule, but furthermore, is actually one of the worst examples I have seen. Nothing about the story is original, and I spent most of the film thinking things like: “Oh, that was just like that one scene in (insert title here), and that was just like (insert other film name).” It didn't even try to mask this. And if I was not making comparisons to other films, I was correctly guessing what was going to happen next; which I wish I could say braggingly, but there really is no challenge.

But let’s get back to basics. Post Grad tells the story of a recent college grad (Alexis Bledel), who is forced to move back in with her ridiculous family when she is unable to find a job in the current market. Sticking with her along the way is her best friend (Zach Gilford), who makes no attempt to hide his more than platonic love for her. Unfortunately, this attempted commentary on the current economic strain and its effects on the job market is the closest thing to inspired story telling. What is left is completely unnecessary “MALBY!” family bonding over buying grandma Malby’s coffin, daddy Malby’s belt buckle investment endeavors, a dead cat, etc, all of which is carried out by an ensemble of uninspired acting; which was complimented by uninspired, and more often than not, over-the-top comedy.

I know I have used the word “uninspired” a lot in this review, but what can I say? Post Grad is nothing but an uninspired compilation of almost every cliché from the romantic comedy genre, so I don’t really feel the need to put more work into this than the filmmakers did.

Final Grade: D

Suggestion Box (Aug. 17 - 23)

Batman: Arkhum Asylum is being released this coming week, so if you haven't checked out the demo on XBOX Live yet, make sure you do. Though you don't get too play too much of the game, you do get to try out some of batman's moves.

Speaking of Arkhum Assylum, a new trailer was released about the origin of the madhouse. Check it out here.

Avatar Teaser Trailer - Wow. I thought this was based on that cartoon with the kid who has a blue arrow on his head. My bad. To keep from making the same mistake I did, learn the differences between Avatar: The Last Airbender (which is cutting Avatar from its name for the film release) and Avatar. With that said, this trailer looks like this film is going to have a lot of potential, though I am not quite sure what the story is going to be. Plus it is being released in 3D, so should be nice to look it. Check it out here.

The Fourth Kind Trailer - What looks to be a promising movie about aliens that is sure to creep me out like no other. Check it out here.

The Lovely Bones Featurette - Provides a deeper glimpse into the making of this film, including some short peeks at how Peter Jackson is integrating CGI work. Check it out here.

Smallville Season 9 Trailer - Now I know what a lot of you are thinking. "Smallville, ugh... That shows gone down hill." And I agree with you somewhat, but I can't give up hope just yet. So if you are willing to continue on with Smallville into the next season, then here is a preview of what's coming up for the man of steel. Check it out here. PS - Though they say he is never going to wear his full uniform, he is at least sporting his crest this time around.

Now Playing Review - District 9

Though it comes in at the tail end, District 9 is easily one of the best movies of the summer.

The story is this: Decades ago a space ship appeared above Earth, coming to a standstill above Johannesburg, South Africa. Growing anxious with the lack of contact, humans decided after months of waiting to take the first step, cutting into the ship to gain access. What they found were millions of malnourished aliens (or “prawns”). Unable to leave the planet, it was decided that in order to “help” the prawns, they would be placed in a sort of shantytown, watched closely over by the militant eye.

However, the story actually begins with Wikus Van De Merwe, a self-righteous, yet awkward employee of the Multi-National United, or MNU. Though he may not be the best man for the job, he is given the task of moving the prawns to a new campsite in order to stifle the uproar their presence is causing with the human citizens of the city. Unfortunately for Wikus, this process cannot occur without something going wrong, and horribly so.

With a story like this, a strong actor is needed to carry the film, especially considering he will be acting against CGI aliens for a lot of it. Luckily for us, Sharlto Copley does this, and more, making it incredibly hard to believe this is his debut role. Not only is he perfect in presenting a man who lets his new promotion go to his head slightly as he tries to perform for the cameras during the eviction process, but he really shines in his portrayal of horror, uncertainty and desperation once everything begins spinning out of his control.

With all this said, what really makes this movie for me is the way in which it is presented. Following the trend of many movies today of a more radical subject matter, District 9 is presented, at times, through news footage and interviews. Now I am not knocking other films of the science fiction genre, but what should be appreciated about this choice is that, similar to Cloverfield and Quarantine, this style adds a sense of reality that other styles may often lack. Not only does it help place all of the beautifully, and realistically, rendered computer generated images in the real environments (especially the prawns, but it also places emphases on the social issues being presented. By adding the illusion that there is an extra lens between the viewer and the footage, particularly with the news footage, this story of discrimination is able to seem unbiased for the most part, and therefore, keeps from becoming preachy.

As much as I love action filled sci-fi films, the ability to integrate that into a story as strong as this in presenting social commentary is what will make this one of the best films of the year, of any genre.

Final Grade: A

Suggestion Box

Assassin's Creed 2: Developer Diary #2

A couple years ago Ubisoft released Assassin's Creed, and it quickly became one of my favorite games. Though there are a few things that I wish had been done a little differently, it seems as if they are addressing these issues for the sequel. The second Developer Diary was posted today on Gamespot.com, and includes a lot of information about the help systems and characters within the cities, as well as a new banking and purchasing system. Check it out here.

For more information you should also check out Developer Diary #1 here, the live demo from E3 here, and the amazing Cinematic Trailer here.

Legend of Neil - The second episode of season 2 was posted this week. Check it out here.

Law Abiding Citizen Trailer - A really eerie turn for Gerard Butler. Check it out here.

Legion Trailer - When God loses his faith in humanity, he calls in his angels to do his dirty work and bring on the Apocalypse. Check it out here.

Rental Review - I Love You, Man

We’ve all been there. Making friends can be a scary experience, full of rejection and awkward attempts to impress others with menial talents and sentence forming capabilities, all in the hopes of finding that special someone to share your bucket of chalk with as you draw beautiful murals on the sidewalk. Oh to be five again… Though this is not quite the context, it is the basic premise of I Love You, Man, a hilarious film that restructures the romantic comedy.

Peter Klaven (Paul Rudd) has a problem. All his life he has been stronger at forming friendships with girls rather than boys. Though this hasn’t caused any problems prior to now, it quickly becomes a slight set back when he realizes he has no one to be the best man at his upcoming wedding. After a series of unsuccessful, blind man dates, he eventually happens upon Sydney Fife (Jason Segel). Sparks fly instantly, and the rest of the film is spent exploring their newfound friendship.

Overall, I Love You, Man is a hilarious bromantic comedy that hints at a far reaching style without ever becoming too ridiculous, thanks in large part to the entire cast. Pual Rudd and Jason Segel are perfect in their lead roles, however, it is actually the other characters, such as Jaime Pressly and Jon Favreau’s hateful love, that makes the movie what it is. Without them, Peter and Sydney’s interactions would have eventually lost their charm, especially as Peter constantly, and awkwardly, attempts to endear himself to Sydney. We get it. Peter doesn’t know how to be cool.

As funny as I Love You, Man is, it does begin to feel a little longer than it should be because the two lead characters are not enough to support the entire film. Luckily, the film is fleshed out enough to keep from being it’s own downfall.

Final Grade: A-

Rental Review - 17 Again

Although 17 Again revisits a story that has had many incarnations already, from Big (1988) to 13 Going on 30 (2004), as this movie proves, sometimes its nice to revisit the past.

17 Again begins in the best years of Mike O’Donnell life. He’s the star of the high school basketball team, he’s in love with the girl of his dreams, and everything is pointing to a bright future. However, the next time we see Mike, clearly things have not turned out how he hoped they would: he’s in the middle of a divorce, he has a strained relationship with his kids, and it is very evident that he is unhappy with his life. Through an interesting turn of events, Mike somehow manages to find himself back in his 17 year old body, with the opportunity to do his life over again, and this time do it right.

This is where this film struggles the most. Similar to 13 Going on 30, Mike makes a choice when he is younger that leads to his life becoming what it is now. However, what is an interesting choice is that the “error” he made was choosing love over a possible career in basketball. Now I don’t want to give away the specifics and/or circumstances, but I felt a little offended when he is older and looks back on this moment in his life as a mistake. I am sure that this is not the intention, but instead of feeling as if he and his wife had slowly grown apart, I felt like they were putting too much blame on her younger self. And when we see her later (played by Leslie Mann), I have no idea how he can resent her for where he is. But that’s just me.

Following Mike’s transformation back into his younger self, the film becomes more promising; however, it never reaches its full potential. For starters, the movie never picks the mood it is trying to go for. Often Mike (Zac Efron, who turns in a stronger performance than I expected) has a lot of charming moments, from putting the school bully in his place to his goal to lead his fellow classmates to abstain from sex. Unfortunately, more often than not, these moments were overshadowed by grander attempts to make the movie funny, which often just lead to really awkwardly over-the-top scenes. Plus, this wasn’t helped by the fact that a lot of the characters could have been written much better. Two examples of this are found in Mike’s best friend, Ned (Thomas Lennon), and his daughter, Maggie (Michelle Trachtenberg). Yes, Ned’s ridiculous love of all things that scream nerd, as well as his attraction to the school principle lead to some great comedic moments, I am just not sure if it really fits with this film. And with Maggie, I am still undecided if Trachtenberg is to blame for a lot of her weak acting or if the blame should be placed on her horrific character.

And one last thing about the characters, though Efron shows a lot of potential with his acting in this film, he really needs to choose rolls that don’t remind the audience of his High School Musical roots if he doesn’t want to be type cast. Not only does his character revolve around basketball again, but also in the beginning of the film he even takes the time before the game to join in on a group dance with the cheerleaders. I half expected him to break out into song at this point.

17 Again has a lot of potential, however, the moments that work to endear this film to the viewer are often overshadowed by the desperate attempts to get a laugh, all of which are unnecessary.

Final Grade: B-

Rental Review - Defiance

These days it is not hard to find a movie or novel pertaining to the horrors of WWII, rarely do these stories rise above the usual sob story and become something more uplifting. Such is the case of Defiance.

This film tells the true story of four Jewish brothers (three of which are played by Daniel Craig, Live Schreiber, and Jamie Bell, all turning in great performances) forced to flee to the forest after German soldiers attack their village. It first appears that this is going to be a simple story of revenge, but luckily it becomes something more. After their first night in the woods they are joined by another group of refugees, and their numbers continue to grow as the story progresses. Though there are a large number of obstacles: fighting amongst themselves, sickness, food shortages, being discovered, etc, even in the most discouraging moments hope somehow remains.

Though Defiance follows the tragic story of this makeshift community and what they must do in order to survive, it is never weighed down by the tragedy of it all. Instead it revels in the fact that these real heroes tried their best to protect a large group of ostracized citizens when they were unable to do so themselves.

Final Grade: B+

Side note – if you have not already, you should read The Book Thief by Markus Zusak. Yes, you might have to take a break because your tears get too dense to see through, but it’s worth it.

Now Playing Review - The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard

I am not going to lie; I was not planning on seeing this movie. The trailer didn’t do anything for me, and most of the time films of this type of comedy tend to be a let down in my book. But who am I to refuse free tickets to a screening?

And now? Well, now I feel a little snooty for prejudging this movie. And I am wearing my shame face…

But let me explain myself. Initially I was turned off by the simplicity of the story, which is about a team of used car salesmen, led by Don Ready (Jeremy Piven), who are hired to help sell all of the cars off a failing lot during a three day sale. However, now I see why they chose something simple: the comedy is so ridiculously out there. Let me break it down a little further. This is a movie about the people living in this world. Take Ready’s team, which includes Jibby Newsome, Brent Gage and Babs Merrick. First of all, Jibby (Ving Rhames) is a man searching for a woman to make love to for the first time in his life though he is far from a virgin. Oh, and he also has a thing for James Van Der Beek. Then there’s Babs (Kathryn Hahn), a woman who falls in love with the dealership owner’s man-child of a son, and spends the rest of the movie trying to trick a ten year old into sleeping with her. And that’s not even the half of it. There is also a crazed old man with a short temper that seems to hate everything, the son to the import car dealership owner with dreams of making it in his “manband,” and a DJ who refuses to play requests, just to name a few. Basically, what I am getting at is that because of the simple plot and setting these characters are able to be as off the wall as they want without seeming too ridiculous; instead, the simplicity seems to somehow manage to ground them.

In the end the over-the-top grandness of this small town car sales event makes The Goods surprisingly enjoyable, and its short running time keeps it from becoming obnoxious and over done. Which is why I will forgive it for the sub plot that is a little too close to one from Meet the Fockers. Plus a great cameo from Will Ferrell and his back up singers doesn’t hurt.

Final Grade: B+

Suggestion Box

Dear perusers,

Though I am having a swell time spilling my thoughts to you about most of the stuff I fill my time with, I have decided to add a new post topic to my usual. The "Suggestion Box" is my way of letting you know about the things I am excited for coming out soon, such as movie and game trailers, upcoming roles for my favorite actors, etc, and hopefully you will take the time to check them out. Here's what I've got for you in this edition of the "Suggestion Box." Oh, and if there is anything you think I should check out, I would like to hear all about it.

The Lovely Bones Trailer - I saw this a week or so ago when it was posted on iTunes, but it was shown before Julie & Julia tonight, and I have to say, I don’t know what to think about it. I read the book a little over 5 years ago, and though it is nothing like how I saw it in my mind, the trailer looks like they are going to do a pretty cool job with bringing the novel to life, especially in concern to Susie’s Heaven. Check it out here.

Whiteout Trailer – Like 30 Days of Night, but with more snow, no vampires, and possibly aliens. (Okay, I doubt it is aliens, however, I am not completely taking it out of the running. But I will admit that it is more than possible that I am reading a little too much into the trailer). But it has Kate Beckinsale so I am going to see it. Check it out here.

Zombieland Trailer - Because who doesn’t want to see Abigail Breslin fighting zombies? Now in Red Band here.

Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog – I know most of you probably know what this is by now, but I am excited because I finally got around to buying it on DVD yesterday, and if you haven’t seen it by now you really need to get on that. It’s a great addition to the Whedon vault, with Neil Patrick Harris, Nathan Fillion and Felicia Day in the lead roles. And who can turn down a musical about superheroes/supervillians? People who are dead inside, that’s who. You can see it for free here, so now there is really no excuse.

Speaking of Felicia Day, if you like gaming then you should check out her web show The Guild. They have two seasons in the bag now and the third season should be starting up August 25th. Check it out here. You can also watch episodes and bonus content on XBOX Live, including the "Do You Want To Date My Avatar?" music video.

And finally, if that is not enough for you in concern to web shows based around gaming, then you should check out The Legend of Neil. Why? Because it is hilarious and is based on The Legend of Zelda, so it gets plenty of bonus points for that one. Check it out here.

Now Playing Review - Julie & Julia

Unfortunately for Amy Adams, the title, Julie & Julia, is a slight exaggeration on the importance of her character to the film. It would be a better representation if it was something along the lines of: Julia Child and Why She Deserves to Have Some Random Woman Dedicate A Year of Her Life to Her. But I guess that has too many words to fit nicely on the poster…

It is not that Amy Adams does not do a great job with the role she is given, but when competing with Meryl Streep’s Julia Child, it is no question that Adams is going to lose. Throughout the film Streep paints a portrait of the eccentric woman that Child was, using her mannerisms, voice, personality, insecurities and cooking prowess to do so, something which any lesser actor could have turned into a caricature.

Filling out the roles around Streep is a great supporting cast, including Stanley Tucci as Julia’s husband, Chris Messina as Julie’s husband, and Linda Emond as Child’s friend and co-writer of the cookbook that is the centerpiece of this film. Though Adams’ name is on the poster next to Streep’s, her character fits more in the supporting role classification than as a lead. Again, let me reiterate that this is no fault on Adams’ part, but unfortunately her role is written in such a way that it seems like an afterthought, or a means to which we can hear more about Child. Not only does she seem one sided in her obsession with Child, but the aspects about her life that do not actually concern Child seem underwritten. For one thing, there are a bunch of scenes with Julie griping about being seen as a B***h (that’s right mom, not gonna catch me using no-no words today!), but I can not remember any moment prior to this that she seems this way. Sure she complains about mistakes she makes in the kitchen (which I would have liked to see more of) and the tiny apartment she shares with her husband, but still. I wouldn’t start flinging names around. Which is also why later in the film I was blindsided when her husband gets so upset that he storms out of the apartment. It just seems so unwarranted.

Don’t get me wrong, for the most part Julie & Julia is a really entertaining movie; however, when it was done I found myself feeling a little unsatisfied. Now a lot of it was because I was dumb enough to go see a movie about food on an empty stomach, but most of it was actually because of how the film ends. (Spoiler alert! Skip to last sentence of paragraph to avoid it) First of all, Julie gets a call close to the end of the film from a man who informs her that Child hates her, Julie broods about this for a minute, and then we never hear about it again. It never gets explained further. But my main complaint is that this movie doesn’t have a satisfying ending; instead, it just ends because Julie completes what she set out to do.

Though the script could do with a little more work to make the two title characters of equal importance, this does not keep it from being a really great film. If anything, go see it to see Streep shine in her role as Julia Child. Just make sure you eat first.

Final Grade: B

Rental Review - Fast & Furious

The Fast and the Furious franchise has had a rough ride since its start in 2001. Following the popularity of the first film, much of the cast and excitement was lost in the sequel, and the third would have been better if it had never been made. Hoping to recreate what was made eight years ago, the franchise got another chance with Fast & Furious. Unfortunately for us, the only things that remain the same besides the title are the four leads and fast cars.

The biggest problem is the uninspired story. The movie begins with Dom (Vin Diesel) and Letty (Michelle Rodriguez) stealing fuel tanks from a moving semi in the Dominican Republic. Following this job Dom decides to leave her behind, fearing his notoriety is bringing unwanted risk. Big mistake on his part, because after an unnoted time change he gets a call from his sister informing him of Letty’s death, and the revenge story begins. Which leads us to Brian (Paul Walker), who is now working for the FBI on a case that will cause him to once again cross paths with Dom.

The problem is not the story set up, but rather how it is executed on the whole. While on his path to finding Letty’s killer, there are moments when Dom replays actions in his mind that he could not possibly know happened. First, it happens when he visits the site of her death, and then again later after he crosses the border back into the US from Mexico (more on that later). Now I understand that it could just be a representation of how he imagines it happened, but it came off more like a supernatural moment of telepathy. And then there is Brian. How on Earth does he still have a job? Not only that, but he has actually been promoted to an FBI agent. He has to have one of the worst track records, constantly placing his loyalties with different groups. It just seems unrealistic, as does the romance element. My main problem with this is the romance is very underdeveloped. Sure Brain and Mia (Jordana Brewster) have a history, but it is a shaky one at best. But before you know it she has forgiven him for all he has done and they are making out on the sink. Sure it was nice to give Brewster a little more screen time, but it would have been best to leave this out.

The story suffers because it takes a back seat to the stunts and action. Now I understand these people are supposed to be some of the best drivers in the world, but I cannot believe they are able to pull off most of what they do. Take the opening scene. Sure I could play along for the actual process of stealing the gas from a semi, but it lost me when the explosions start, eventually leading to the tanks tumbling down the hill and over Dom’s car, barely missing it. If it happened once I would have chalked it up to luck, but something like this happens over and over again, whether it be with these tanks, flipping cars, etc. On a similar note, Dom has to move across the border with a group of drivers, which includes Brian. However, because they are carrying drugs they cannot just cross the border at a checkpoint. In order to escape Border Patrol detection, they drive through a tunnel at the base of a mountain range, a feat that seems as if it should only be possible if they were traveling in mine cars. I might have let it slide, but it occurs again later in the film.

At best, Fast & Furious holds some faint comparisons to the movie that started the franchise, but unfortunately for this film, no amount of girl on girl action can detract from how noticeably bad this film is.

Final Grade: D+

TV Review - Dollhouse (S1, E6)

Man on the Street

IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO REMAIN UNSPOILED ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS DURING EACH EPISODE, READ MY OVERALL REVIEW OF THE SHOW, WHICH WILL BE POSTED SOON

Does this count as pedophilia? Because I feel really icky right about now.

With that said, at this point in the season this episode replaces Gray Hour as my favorite, and it shows exactly what this show should be. Unfortunately there are just so many different elements to point out that I think I am going to have to bullet point this one:

• At the beginning of the episode either the reporter or one of the people being questioned mentions that there were rumors floating around in the 80s about the Dollhouse. Say what? They had this technology in the 80s?
• Speaking of the video footage from this report, not only were a lot of them funny (yeah I am talking about you man wanting to experience men in a “non-gay” way. No one believes you. And the realization of this on the face of the woman with him is fantastic). However, much to the story as a whole, these little clips speak to the good vs. bad argument involving the services of the Dollhouse.
• In one of the first episodes Echo walks in on Sierra being scanned or something, and now she is creeping in doorways listening to conversations. Anyone else find the visual of that kind of hilarious?
• I wish the show would at least try to give off the impression that there are more than three dolls doing all of the engagements.
• How the heck does Ballard keep managing to have run-ins with Echo? Twice in this episode, actually. Okay, I guess the second doesn’t really count, but more about that later. I am just saying that he has the most bipolar luck ever. One moment he happens to turn to watch a news report, only to see Echo on the screen, and the next he is getting framed for shooting an officer.
• Speaking of Ballard, in this episode he gets tazed and was back up on his feet two seconds later taking out the security guys. So now he is both lucky and a rhinoceros.
• Echo’s housewife persona in this episode is great, especially when her mind somehow finds its way to the idea that the man of her dreams is actually in porn and does not let go of this. Go back and watch that scene. It’s great.
• There new graphics for designing the imprints looks fantastic.
• What is up with Joss Whedon and his kill switches? I mean, one moment you have a character like River, or in this case, a nice neighbor being more or less helpless, and with the uttering of a few words they go into assassin mode. Very handy…
• Not only do we learn that there are dollhouses all over the place, but also that the dollhouses have a grander purpose than providing fantasies for clients. I bet they want to take over the world…
• This episode was written and edited perfectly. From the moment Ballard gets in bed with the neighbor and confides with her completely about what he is investigating (and DeWitt saying she has to be taken care of didn’t hurt with this belief) you know she is going to die. But she doesn’t! Not only does she not die, but she was a few inches away from going all American History X on that guy.
• If it wasn’t Alpha that messed with Echo’s imprint, then who else has the brainpower to do so?
• This episode ended perfectly. Okay, now I know before I said that I was sick of the episodes smacking the audience in the face with all the ways Echo is remembering things from engagements, but you have to admit, it is kind of beautiful this time around. Sure it is still wrong, but how could you not feel bad for that guy? He just wants to be able to make his wife happy.

Final Grade: A+

Quote of the episode: DeWitt - "There are three flowers in a vase. The third flower is green."

TV Review - Dollhouse (S1, E5)

True Believer

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Okay, so I know I have been using the word parallels a lot, mainly because my synonyms seem to be lacking at the moment, but this episode was all about the comparisons from one crazy to the next. First you have this ATF man who seems just as corrupt as the guy he is trying to get to. But more prominently, the cult’s belief in returning to the Garden of Eden is a huge analogy for what the Dollhouse is hoping to do with the dolls themselves, at least in their innocent state. “We must keep it pure,” and all that jazz. I understand what Joss is trying to do; I just wish the writers would realize not every storyline has to be a metaphor for the Dollhouse. But, while I am drawing connections between these two things, does this mean that the Dollhouse is going to go down in flames in the end?

With the subject matter of purity and religion, it is a great relief that this episode did not take itself to seriously. I am, of course, referring to the “man reactions.” By now it has been made obvious that something is going on with the dolls, whether it is learning or instinctual, it is evolution nonetheless. And now Victor is being turned on by the opposite sex! Yay! This was funny enough on its own, but listening to Topher try to explain this to Dr. Saunders was pretty amusing.

Which brings me to something else. Though some of the characters still seem to be developing on the acting/writing end, it is great to see how many of them are interacting together. I have already mentioned that I love the scenes between Echo and her handler, Boyd, but now I am really hoping to see more between both Topher and Dr. Saunders, as well as Ballard and Loomis (AKA computer/photo recognition lady). She may not play too big of a part in the series, but the scenes where Ballard tries to charm her into doing something for him, and then later when she figures out Ballard’s lead is actually just the mailroom guy, are great. Also, Ballard got to be more than just a stiff FBI agent, which I really appreciated.

Speaking of characters. At first I wasn’t all for Echo’s “I have found my knew Jesus” gig, but once she realizes that Jonas Sparrow is not the man she hoped he is, but is rather crazy, she let her inner BA out, and all was good. She’s all like, “I have seen the light, and in the light I have found cuss words and the ability to knock people out with a single punch! BAM!” But I do have to ask, if she has not sight read since she was nine, would she really have been able to read that well now? And more importantly, did I know the word Nebakanezer when I was 9?

Finally, three things I am hoping for at this point. Okay, technically I do know what is going to happen in the rest of the season (minus the last episode), so just play along. I want to start learning about who Caroline/Echo actually is. At least show us a different picture or video of her. Secondly, can we stop ending the episodes with these little “reveals” that Echo is remembering things? We get it already. Sure, “I see perfectly” is clever because she was blind, but lets get some grander scale revelations going on already. Or if that is asking too much, just insert these smaller moments, very subtly, throughout the episode instead of always ending on that note, with the fade out music upping the moment. And last but not least (okay, maybe least), but can we deal with Dominic, the head of security at the Dollhouse, and his issues with Echo already? Cuz he is just obnoxious.

Final Grade: B

Quote of the Episode: Echo (as Esther) - "Seth. The blind girl is looking you in the eye. Do you know what that means? It means God brought me here. He has a message for you. And that message is, 'Move your ass!'"

TV Review - Dollhouse (S1, E4)

Gray Hour

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Before I get into the main storyline of the episode, can I just ask: who would pay the Dollhouse the ridiculous sum they charge for a midwife?

Up to this point in the season I would say this is my favorite episode because it moves past the basic “engagement of the week” set up, and we get to learn a lot more about how a doll’s mind works after Echo gets remotely wiped in the real world. When this first happens Echo acts like the confused child she usually is, but once she gets over that hump we get to see her thought process past the repetitive “I think I will go swim” and “I try to be my best.” She might not be a prodigy or anything, but it was still interesting to hear her relate to a Picasso painting. And though it is evident that she was learning about her environment while in the vault, it did not go to far. For one thing, it would have been too much if she had been able to open the vault door from within in that state of mind, even if she did have her “imprint” talking her through it. Speaking of this imprint, another first for the series is having two dolls imprinted as the same person. Sure, it would have been cooler if they met while both like this, but for now this will have to do.

And finally, though this was an intense episode, the writing, especially concerning the dialog, was brought back to the level at which it should be. In this episode Topher gets a lab assistant, and their interactions are pretty humorous. Plus, there were a lot of great one-liners. When Topher is comparing the actions of the dolls as animalistic in the sense that they are instinctual, Boyd says that they aren’t bison, to which Topher responds, “They’re a little bit bison.” And then later when Echo is in the vault she says: “I don’t like this room anymore. Where are the better rooms?” I know that this is a high concept drama, but the thing I always liked about Joss Whedon’s shows were how easily comedy is laced in even when the show leans towards the melodramatic, and this reminded me of that.

Final Grade: A

Quote of the Episode: Topher - "Being wiped is not unlike being born. It’s traumatic. I mean, in here, we minimize the trauma with throw pillows and perfectly crunchy lettuce. There’s no conflict. But out there it’s all…Fluorescent lights and forceps. Right now, Echo is experiencing extreme sensory overload. That could lead to a coma state. Or it could turn her into Carrie at the prom."

TV Review - Dollhouse (S1, E3)

Stage Fright

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You know it’s not a good sign when your reaction to the episode you are about to sit through is “Ugh, I hate this episode.” I just don’t want to watch a whiny pop singer who got what she wanted complain about it. You want to be free? Quit. You hate being from the same cookie cutter as every other pop sensation? Pull a Mandy Moore. Sure she is not as popular as she once was, but she at least seems happy with where she’s at in her career now. And the intervention/trade in the end was just lame, including with how it was further explained by DeWitt moments after I had to sit through it. Then there is Victor reveal as a doll, which was completely anticlimactic because the press photos for Dollhouse ruined it. Finally, trying to compare the pop singer, Rayna, to a doll by having her complain about being a factory cut out and everyone’s fantasy was a little much.

The only things that saved this episode were the little things: Echo’s learning and evolution as a doll is continuing, there was a cool transition between the gunshots fired at the Rayna to Ballard being taken to the hospital in an ambulance (though there is no question he isn’t going to die), and I think the subtle parallels between Rayna’s stalker and Ballard’s neighbor were a nice touch. Does that girl just stand inside the door to her apartment just staring out through the peephole? Doesn’t she have a job or something? But the best part was when Echo smashes Rayna over the head with a metal chair. Totally deserved.

Oh yeah, and one last thing. Anyone else notice that when Echo got the job as a backup singer Dushku did a little move that I swear she did in Bring It On? Wow, I just creeped myself out with that observation… I think it’s a sign that I need to go visit the great outdoors for a little while… Eh, maybe next week.

Final Grade: C-

Quote of the Episode: Topher: Boyd? What, are you guys buddies now? Oh, God, of course you are. You both disapprove of everything. You’re gonna get married and have scowly babies.